Wednesday, September 28, 2005

Hand in hand, like two peas in a pod 

I'm not speaking of anything worthwhile, of course. What? You thought this was one of those "politico-blogs?" No, people. I'm referring to the two most recent pieces of spam I received. They shed a little sunlight on an otherwise drab day. This first spam mail is for more Cialis tablets (there must be some nasty rumor about me floating around the internet) by none other than one "Giz Gizem." Boy... they just aren't trying anymore, are they? Giz Gizem??? Faaaaaaaaaantastic. I'm pretty sure that the biggest perk (and problem -- shh!) of having an email address at SMRT-TV for reader response is that it regularly puts me in contact with worthwhiles like Giz Gizem. His message to me is great, too.
Cialis Softtabs - confidentially yours.

Simple, concise, and most importantly, discrete. Thanks, Giz!

But it gets better. The following piece of spam is from sender "Family Memories." I want someone to name their kid "Family Memories." Come on, it'd be great! Just picture it: Family Memories Johannson. I wouldn't name my son or daughter that because I am a compassionate and sensitive man, but surely one of you is up to the task? Surely! Family Memories' message to me was far less exciting, though, in as much as there wasn't one. Everything was in the subject line:
Make Memories Last with a Complimentary Canon EOS Camera!

But there was no body to the email. Disappointing, I say. No, I will not buy your crappy Canon EOS Camera, Family Memories. Advantage: Giz Gizem!

I only noted this because the juxtaposition of the names Giz Gizem and Family Memories tickled me ever so. Those might very well be the two single phrases that one is mandated to keep at opposite ends of their lexicon, never to have one be associated with the other. Ah, the internet... And hey! If they got married, you'd have "Family Gizem." How great (awful) is that?!

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