Thursday, March 09, 2006

I dreamed a dream in time gone by 

Evidently, I still dream about a girl that I had a crush on in the second grade (and only in the second grade) and haven't shared so little as a parting glance with since high school. These dreams don't happen frequently enough to be considered "recurring," but certainly enough to where I've got a running tally. It's usually the same scenario, though never the same setting. She and I separate from a group and have misadventures. Our love takes hold, though never in a salacious manner, and we couldn't be happier to be with one another. It's very innocent. Mostly. Mentally, it's like we're Goonies only we're madly attracted to each other. But even in my dreams, I'm cogniscent of our real-life relationship or lack there-of. So, it's strange. We'll be running through some rival high school (what??) or museum when we should be in school (not quite the treasure hunt of Goonies) or, I don't know... wrecking shit and running away from trouble together. And the whole time, I'm thinking: "Dreams can kiss my ass. I'm enjoying the moment, but I know it's not real. She doesn't really like me. Like I need a tease, right now."

Whatever. This is stupid. I don't even know why I'm writing it. Probably because I just need to write something. It's a compulsion. And, really, I need a way to transfer my bitterness. I'm just pissed off that my fucking computer has already contracted a virus (just my luck when it comes to anything technological) and I've had it for less than a month. Maybe tonight I'll dream about having a virus-free computer. How sad would that be?

Fuck you, subconscious.

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