Friday, March 17, 2006

There are too many Irish nowadays. Please eliminate three. 

It's St. Patrick's Day. On a Friday. Guess that means I will most certainly not be going to a bar or pub tonight as it'll be impossible to get a drink (or even get in!). I'm not Irish – never have been - so what do I care about today? Not that much. But I know this: we've all had just about enough of these "Irish" types running our towns, controlling the media, monopolizing the financial district, and buying off the government. Oh sure, they have their Lucky Charms cereal and their green beer, but don't they also have their grubby little hands firmly around the proverbial neck of this country? In this age of rampant terrorism, aren't we all ignoring the real threat here? I say, we return to the days of the early 1800s and relegate the Leprechauns to second class citizens! I say! By the way, you've never heard of a female leprechaun, have you? You'd surely know if you did, because if there's a pot of gold in the mix, you can bet that bow-legged slag would forever be attached at the hip of all those male leprechauns, harassing them for fancy cars and flashy jewelry and a shopping spree at the mall. Those females are all alike, man.

Listen, you could say that I'm a little bitter that the post supervisor at work said (at my behest) that he'd replace the water cooler today with a keg of green beer. As of this moment, no such replacement has occurred. You could say that. And you might be right. Harrumph. Happy (?) St. Patties.

Drive safely tonight, people.

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