Friday, May 19, 2006

Impossible Mission 

Da Vinci Code is tracking at a dismal 17% on RT. Hey, that's an improvement from the 6% it had yesterday, I guess. As subpar and amateurish as I hear the book to be, I'm still really surprised that what everyone thought to be a cash cow is getting slaughtered so mercilessly by the critics. I don't know. I thought there would be some tighter quality control on this. Very interested to see, now, if this has a profound effect on it's box office. I mean, it doesn't star Tom Cruise or anything, but it's getting shredded.

Speaking of MIIIIIIIIIIIII, I saw it a couple weeks back and thought it was pretty fun. Pretty dumb, but pretty fun. Great action set pieces. Yeah, so it's alright and then the ending is really cheesy and you're thinking "Ah, whatever, that's just Tom Cruise stroking himself." But then... Now I ain't sayin' he's a gold digga. Oh wait. Yes I am. Kanye West, you should be ashamed of yourself for putting out perhaps the single worst song in the history of Western Civilization. It's everything that is horrible about everything, movie soundtracks included. Even LL Cool J's "Deepest Bluest" from Deep Blue Sea had more effort put into it. By leaps and bounds, at that. Seriously, Kanye, don't ever go into a recording studio again. Rhyming "gosspital" with hospital? I hate you.

Shifting gears, Bill Simmons has a really strong article on the return of the NBA. You know? The one you actually enjoyed watching? Yeah, it seems to be back. I'll admit that my interest still isn't terribly high with the Lakers out of it, but what I have watched has been quality. It really looks like we're going to have three game sevens in this second round. That's right, as "unpredictable" as they turned out to be, I see neither Dallas or Cleveland winning their respective series tonight against San Antonio or Detroit. If either happens, I'll be stunned.

Stunned? Unpredictable? Hey, I didn't pick a single one of the NHL's final four. Carolina vs Buffalo out East and Anaheim vs Edmonton out West. If you picked these four teams to get this far, start playing the roulette table in Vegas right freaking now.

Regarding the Eastern Finals, anyone here think this one isn't going the distance? I'm picking Carolina by the narrowest of margins, but Buffalo has proven everyone wrong every step of the way. I think the presence of Weight and Brind'Amour gives Carolina the slight edge. Should be fantastic hockey.

Out West, Edmonton outgritted, out-toughed, and plain outworked San Jose and Detroit to get here. The Ducks have been just dominant since game 7 against Calgary. We're lucky as hockey fans to have another good series on our plates, one brimming with new potential stars like Joffrey Lupul and Shawn Horcoff. As well as Dwayne Roloson has played in goal for the Oil, I still have this stigma in my head of, "Yeah... but it's Roloson." So help me, I just can't get past that. And if Anaheim's third line keeps producing at the frenetic clip it was against the Avalanche, watch out. I like the Ducks in six.

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